HIDDING/PASSING

last night i was at a dinner for Easter and people asked me how I am. the only two people who know I am Queer is the young couple i visited. Her family is Christian. I wanted to share my great news, about my new group i am starting and being accepted into an organization that will support me and i said nothing, not even to the fact i was in my first relationship with a woman and what meaning that had for me. I hid and passed as straight i guess. My friend G when i went into the kitchen asked me how i was and i shared some of what i was feeling and he said that's not my business and i shared that i felt to afraid to share with the rest of his family my life as it is now. the feelings of being proud and out I tucked away and i over ate to keep my feelings at bay. when i drove home from Guelph i felt sadness. I did not want to be shunned for my choices and loose connection. this is part of the narrow places i will live for the rest of my life.