stress

I literally have no appepitie these days, trauma time is present for me that lives on my right side. I have been resourcing as much as possible and I am deeply ensconced in my grief. I am also losing a family member who is dying and has been so dear to me... and to stay in the window while everything goes on even in listening to the wind.

I am going on with my own life and i have this trauma part of my personality that is living in the past... wanting things to be different that what is... I am taking care of those places within and sometime it is a constant conversation and learning to wait to speak again. Last night at the end of the night i had some chocolate ( nothing is out of bounds for me ) small pieces not like a whole container and my body said stop and I did had my tea, acknowledged the day and went to bed. I did not get on the scale to see if I gained any weight... that is big for me... and continuing on harvesting my garden feeling into my feelings.... and being...